“Behind the Badge” “The soul of a man”
By Joseph Pangaro
What is the value of a human life? What value does a man brings to the world? What lives does he touch? What is the soul of a man?
I know a man named Gary. He was my friend, he was a mentor, he was a very good cop and he was a great man.
Gary had gentle soul and a sharp mind. Quick to laugh and share a smile or lend a hand to anyone in need, he was a reserved man in public and always a professional. I saw him offer advice to people that most would have shunned. I saw him offer kindness to many who needed it, and he was the first to say “Everyone has dignity and deserves respect”.
He also told me that a good cop could always spot a bad guy, even if the bad guy was wearing a three piece suit. He showed me and many other officers what the word courage really meant. Never afraid to enter the fray, or jump into the battle to protect the innocent. He said courage is not the absence of fear it is being afraid and doing a thing anyway. He lived that persona, an iron back bone in the worst of times, and a calming word when the storm had passed. All who knew him are better off for having had the privilege.
He leaves behind a legacy of doing the right thing, perseverance, honor and fidelity. He protected his community with a sense of pride and was an example to all. The people of Ocean Township have lost giant.
It is impossible to know what lives in a mans heart, we can only guess by watching his actions on the stage of life. As Gary rose through the ranks he accepted the responsibility that came with each new position and worked diligently to make the police department better, even though each promotion took him further away from the work he loved the most, policing in the street.
If he was unhappy about something you did he never lost his temper. He used each instance to help you understand what was wrong with whatever you did. He used these times as teaching moments to make you better. You never walked away from a conversation with Capt Gary feeling as though he thought less of you, or that he harbored anger towards you. This was the good of the man. He saw the good in people and reflected that back to them no matter the situation.
People who knew Gary would say he was quiet on the outside, which was often true. A reserved man who did not go for big shows of emotion or dramatic expression of his opinion. He made his point with reason and logic.
There was another side to him as well, and for those of us who had the opportunity to see that side we will always remember his wide grin and hearty laugh. At times like a school boy he would step away from his normal steady appearance and beam, the laughs revealing a fun loving, easy going part of him that made you feel good.
These simple memories and thousands of others from countless people who knew Gary will be retold and relived many times over the next few weeks. In that way he will bring a lightness and comfort to all of us as we say good bye to this gentle man. There are times in life when you know you have met a unique person, a person of value. Gary was that kind of man, a genuinely decent person, and that was his soul. I am blessed, as are all the people who were lucky enough to call Gary a friend.
God speed Gary, we will all miss you.
